Monday, January 28, 2013

The Coincidence Field

The Coincidence Field

My life is full of weird things. So much so that I kind of take them for granted. People are often shocked and amazed by the things that happen to me. Some of the things are good, some bad, and others just bizarre.

Meh… you get used to it after a while.

Sometimes I get hit full in the face with strong feelings of “déjà vu.” REALLY strong. They feel more like prophecy fulfilled than simply ghosts of things that I have already seen/felt/visited before. That’s ok though, because sometimes I get strong feelings of “Vújà de”, which is the feeling that this has never happened before and is probably never going to happen again. They tend to more or less balance each other out.

Time is often weird for me. Future, past, present… they tend to jumble some times. Ever read “Dune”? The one by Frank Hebert about the desert planet? The one where the lead character, Paul “Muad’Dib” Atredis becomes the “Kwisatz Haderach”, a guy that can stand in the flow of the past, present and future at the same time. He becomes a prophet who eventually gets to see his own death coming. Ain’t prophets lucky folks?

Anyway. If you’ve read it you might get it. If you haven’t, it works like this for me. Out of the blue I’ll feel detached, separated from where I am and what’s going on. I’ll see a blast of the future and feel my age in excruciating detail. So hard it’s a panic attack. I feel the weight of it on my chest. It feels like the decades left in my life are going to be over in a blink.

Sometimes it’s about the past. Sometimes I touch an artifact or visit a place with a history and all the years of its existence hit me like a Mac truck. I can feel the lives of the people who touched the thing or lived in the place. For a brief moment I know them, I get glimpses of them. It’s sometimes sad, sometimes scary, and sometimes wonderful. You know I worked in museums, right? That was a thrill. So many opportunities, so many occurrences.

Sometimes I’ll be stuck in a moment in the present. I’ll feel it stretch out far, far into the horizon. It feels like its going to last forever and time is meaningless. I tend to like those. They happen in the Fall a lot when I’m walking alone and the wind rustles the dry leaves and you can smell that “smell” of life getting ready for a good night’s sleep before waking up again to a brand new shiny day.

Best of all is the coincidence field. I mean, it’s the name of this entry, right? In the past I thought I was just subject to weird coincidences. Lots of them. All the time. A song runs through my head that I haven’t heard or thought about in years and I’ll hear it on the supermarket Muzak later that day. Old friends will contact me the day after they come to mind. I’ll see an actress on TV and swear I KNOW who she is. I’ll look her up online and who do you think is in every movie and TV show I see for the next 3 days? Yep.

Coincidence, right? Well that’s my point. But for me it is a daily occurrence. So much so that I don’t even think about it anymore. The oddest part is that it seems to be some sort of field that can reach out and draw others into its Kung-fu grip...

During the 2012 election season my lovely partner Terry would try to get a rise out of her liberal friends by subtly implying that she was a big Mitt Romney supporter, even though she wasn’t. Of course I felt it was my duty to play along and then tease her myself about her good buddy “Mittens.” After the election Terry and I were driving through North Conway during a trip to the “Wooden House”, which my true and loyal readers know about through posts gone by. The topic of “Mittens” somehow came up and I was poking her a little about it. She said that enough was enough and I told her that I was going to let it drop. Less than a minute later we rounded a bend in the road and there’s a billboard. A big one. What does it say? You guessed it. Mitt Romney for President. Best part? Someone has defaced the sign by crossing out Mitt and changing it to “Mittens.” There’s even a little drawing of a kitty’s face. Terry is more than a bit surprised until I point out to her that she sees this happen to me all the time.

That’s when the field reaches out and swallows her whole.

Now when she’s around me, and for some time after, the coincidences affect her too. Sadly, hers often happen in not-so-opportune situations. She tried to duck a meeting with someone so she could run some important errands and she ran smack into them while trying to do those errands. Oops.

Of course I feel bad for her. My coincidences are more harmless than bad and, like I said, I don’t really even think about them. They are often wrapped in good karma but sometimes I wish a winning lottery ticket would coincidentally fall out of the sky…

Who knows? Maybe all of these things aren’t that uncommon after all. Maybe all of you, my dear readers, feel and encounter these sorts of things all the time. But having lived a life where I often felt like an alien outsider it is often difficult to know what’s on the minds of the “normal” folk. I am curious to know, though. Maybe folks will stumble upon this and actually tell me a little about it.

Wouldn’t that be a great coincidence?


Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home